Skip to main content
UF Institute of Food and Agricultural Sciences Extension logo
Give      University of Florida
Resources
    Classes
    • Register for a Class
    Toggle Search Form
    GIVE UNIVERSITY OF FLORIDA
    • HOME
    • About
    • Classes
    • Dating
          • Communicating with Your Partner
          • Having Fun and Staying Close
          • Are You in a Healthy Relationship?
          • Coping with Problems and Challenges
          • Sex and Intimacy
          • Where Is This Going?
          • Dating for Teens and Youth
          • In Spanish/En Español
    • Engaged
          • Preparing for Marriage
          • Marriage Basics
          • Communicating with Your Partner
          • Having Fun and Staying Close
          • Coping with Problems and Challenges
          • Sex and Intimacy
          • Intimate Partner Violence and Abuse
          • In Spanish/En Español
    • Married
          • Communicating with your Partner
          • Having Fun and Staying Close
          • Coping with Problems and Challenges
          • Sex and Intimacy
          • Domestic Violence and Abuse
          • Military Couples' Corner
          • In Spanish/En Español
    • Divorced/Remarried
          • Help for Couples Trying to Work It Out
          • Divorcing with Mutual Respect
          • Dating as a Single Parent
          • Remarried Couples
          • Building Your Stepfamily
          • Domestic Violence and Abuse
          • In Spanish/En Español
    • Parents
          • Managing Child Development and Behavior
          • Advocating for Your Child
          • Making Time for Each Other
          • Parents as Partners
          • Teen Dating: What Parents Should Know
          • Relationship Violence and Abuse
          • In Spanish/En Español

    Smart Couples

    Smart Couples

    Three students highlighting a classes link

    Make the SMART Choice
    Register for a Class Today

    Smart couples logo, Strengthening Marriages and Relationships Training

    Three students highlighting a classes link

    Make the SMART Choice
    Register for a Class Today

    Smart couples logo, Strengthening Marriages and Relationships Training

    Older Couples and Sex

    Home / Married / Sex and Intimacy

    If you’re over the age of 60, you’re probably well aware of the stereotypes that are out there when it comes to the subject of older adults and sex! For instance, you may have heard that older people are not very interested, have a “boring” sex life, or can’t perform due to age-related problems or medical concerns. You might feel that the media is telling you aren’t, or can’t be, sexy. Younger people might even assume that your relationship is physically chaste.

    But what’s the true reality when it comes to older adults and sex? You probably won’t be surprised to learn that real life is more interesting and complicated than the stereotypes.

    The Numbers

    According to a 2008 study of over 3000 adults aged 57 to 85, sexual activity does drop off somewhat with age. It is more frequent among those aged 57 to 64 than those 65 and over. About half of the men and women in this survey said they experienced at least one sexual problem, such as lack of desire or having a hard time keeping an erection.

    However, a significant majority of those surveyed in these age groups were definitely still having sex, though this was more true for men than women. And many said they’d like to be having sex more.

    Common Concerns

    The presence of serious health issues in one or both partners is probably the #1 concern for older adults when it comes to intimacy. When someone is sick or has a health problem, feelings of exhaustion, fear, medication side effects, and so can really interfere with having sex. Research finds that this lack of intimacy can then be tied to lower relationship satisfaction.

    Performance and arousal issues are also relatively common for men and women. Worries about appearance and the aging of the physical body can also get in the way for some.

    The Gifts of Aging

    However, there are also some real perks that can come along with a mature sex life. With children out of the house, there may be more time for romance and sexuality. Older adults are often more relaxed, confident, and able to express themselves, leading to more satisfying sexual encounters. Interestingly, some studies even suggest that women who are at the oldest end of the spectrum are more sexually content. And research shows that sex is often both more emotionally and physically satisfying at older ages than it is for young adults, with less conflict around the subject. At times, sex really does get better with age.

    To Keep in Mind

    If difficulties develop, don’t forget that communication may be the key. Though it can be awkward to bring up these concerns, even in a relationship of long standing, it’s worth it. Changes that happen with age may mean that your expression and style of sexuality will change, but this may be quite positive in the end.

    Talk to your partner, and if needed, speak to a physician or a sex therapist. There are many ways to cope with these concerns, from medical therapy to changing and broadening your definition of intimacy. The important thing is to look for solutions. According to studies, even a small amount of sex can make a big positive difference to older adults’ relationships.

    As a final reminder, don’t forget to stay safe. Depending on their relationship situation, older adults who are sexually active may need to remember to protect themselves against sexually transmitted infections, which have increased dramatically among this age group.

    While sexuality can sometimes be a challenge as we grow older, rewards also accompany maturity. There’s no reason to assume that this enjoyable part of life has to dwindle or disappear as we age. Enjoy your sexuality throughout life.

    Looking for ways to connect and get closer with your partner? Want to know more about healthy relationships? The SMART Couples project is offering ELEVATE, a free, research-backed relationship enhancement class for couples, in Florida counties across the state. All our programs are taught by trained professionals and are welcoming to all. Sign up today!


    By Carol Church, lead writer, SMART Couples, Department of Family, Youth and Community Sciences, University of Florida

    References

    Galinsky, A.M., & Waite, L.J. (2014). Sexual activity and psychological health as mediators of the relationship between physical health and marital quality. Journals of Gerontology, Series B: Psychological Sciences and Social Sciences, 69(3), 482–492. https://doi.org/10.1093/geronb/gbt165

    Lindau, S.T., et al. (2007). A study of sexuality and health among older adults in the United States. New England Journal of Medicine, 57:762–774. http://dx.doi.org/10.1056/NEJMoa067423

    Lodge, A. C. & Umberson, D. (2012). All shook up: Sexuality of mid- to later life married couples. Journal of Marriage and Family, 74, 428-443.

    Trompeter, Susan E. et al. Sexual activity and satisfaction in healthy community-dwelling older women. The American Journal of Medicine, 125, 1, 37 - 43. http://dx.doi.org/10.1016/j.amjmed.2011.07.036


    Return to Topic: Sex and Intimacy

    University of Florida Logo
    Contact

    Feedback
    UF/IFAS Extension SMARTCouples
    University of Florida Department of Family, Youth and Community Sciences, 3001 McCarty Hall, Gainesville, Florida 32611
    352-273-3507

    Land Grant Mission
    • Teaching
    • Research
    • Extension
    Information
    • Ask IFAS (EDIS)
    • UF/IFAS Experts
    • UF/IFAS Blogs
    • UF/IFAS Bookstore
    Policy
    • Accessible UF
    • EEO Statement
    • IFAS Web Policy
    • SSN & UF Privacy
    • Analytics (Google Privacy)

    © 2025 University of Florida, IFAS Last Modified:Mon, 24 Jun 2024 15:39:38 EDT